One of a kind and of the few that has my heart, if not the only one

I think I'm going through a 'phase' so my posts are addressing you. I don't usually address you directly.

Do you have a constant? By 'constant' I mean a song/film/band/person etc who has been in your life since you were a child and/or as far back as you can remember? That's a want that's become a need?

I do. As soon as I experienced it as a child I have never let it go. I was a fully-fledged supporter and I have paid every time I can experience Them. They are international, they are truly one of a kind and as close to perfection as you can get.

No one who hasn't seen them understands. And you can't really describe them.

Every time, every single time their quality is top-notch and they never disappoint me. They manage everything in-house and it's an immense team effort.

Whenever I see them I do not skimp, I pay top dollar for the best experience and by God it is worth it.

They are about the only constant I feel so deeply about that I have in my life. I don't think I will ever feel or have another like it.

Even if I can never experience them again, I think the biggest problem right now is covid-19, they will always always be a part of me and they will always have my heart.

I am lucky enough to have been exposed to them in the nicest way and introduced to them because not everyone has the means.

I forgot, one time I wasn't organized enough so I missed them one time. But that is the only time.

I actually put time, money and effort in to see them. I've flown domestically because of my love for them. I always have time, money and effort for them.

Je t'adore.

- A.M.

My two beautiful rocks

I love you both so much. You are so precious to me.

How and when (and where) we met was so serendipitous and in such a short space of time, but you are two of the most important people in my life. It doesn't matter we're not related by blood. That means fuck all to me.

You have always, always been there. Always. You've been with and 'seen' me at both ends and you never left me. You never stopped listening. When others decided to not listen and leave me, you never did. You held my hand and walked with me. You still listen to me. You still walk with me. You never judged me. You never distrusted me. You never not believed me. You may not have always agreed with me, but you accepted me. You still do. I feel as if you take me exactly for who I am and that is so rare to find in people.

I feel so incredibly lucky to have such rarities in my life who not only do I love, but who reciprocate.

I would like more but when you express your love without me asking for it, it's so organic and special and at times, unexpected and surprising. And sometimes it means so, so much, especially when I need it. Just knowing how much you love me can make a huge difference to me.

I want you both in my life until the day I die. I want you to be with me at the big moments in my life like my wedding. You will be standing next to me if I get married. I want you to be amongst the first to see my child or children after and if they are born. I would consider you to be his/her/their legal guardians. You will know if I get divorced. You will know when I change jobs. You will know when I move. You know about the important things in my life and will know about them. You also know about the small things in my life. Life is made up of the big and small shit.

You have given me so much more than other people I've had in my life since I was born and/or who knew me intimately. You have never, ever hurt me. I can't imagine there ever being a time where you are not a part of my life.

In fact, sometimes you are my definition of happiness and you make me feel that from my head down to the tips of my toes.

I have needed you so much, I think I have needed you less, but I'm still trying to improve. The overneed comes and goes in waves, but I'm trying and need to keep it even, like a see-saw.

You both know you're really important to me and that I love you deeply, but 'stating' it on my blog where people can read it is making it 'public' and you totally deserve it.

I love you infinitely SP and SA,

- A.M.